Last night I was brushing my teeth, and
I was looking at myself in the mirror and thought:
“You know what? if I was cooler I would probably walk around with my collar flipped up. But I don’t think I could pull that off.”
Then there was some ambient noise of water and toothbrush.
“I wonder how I would describe my sense of style if Reluctant Hero magazine (now defunct) were to ask me. I think I would probably say that I didn’t want to be so pretentious as to… wait, pretentious isn’t the right word. I need the verb. Pretent? Is that a word? No… Pretend? Is pretend the verb form of pretentious?”
Spit.
Then I smiled some because that was possibly the best stream of thought ever.